The Power of Nightmares

A three-hour BBC documentary that documents the rise (and fall?) and the intriguing similarities between Al Qaeda and the Neoconservatives, and how they use fear to gain control and run the masses. Towards the end, the film also makes the curious case that Al Qaeda, as we think of it, is a myth. It's thought-provoking, and I guess you can't expect much more than that from a documentary.

Close Encounters of the Third Kind

I usually start reviews with a plot description, but I can't here because there's no plot. Richard Dreyfuss encounters an alien ship, becomes obsessed with aliens, and then goes to see them land in Wyoming. That's the beginning of a plot, but not enough to warrant 137 minutes of people looking up in the sky. Maybe if something happened on the ship at the end, or if there were some significant obstacles to him getting to the ship, but that's not really the case. It has good special effects, although it looks like Spielberg got the E.T. costumes from leftovers from this film.

Speed Racer

His first name is Speed, and his last name is Racer. Guess what he does. He races cars -- fast, colorful, gravity-defying cars. Generally, I don't like movies with a lot of CGI, kids movies, more than 2-hour-long movies, and movies based on old TV shows. But the Wachiowski brothers made this, so I gave it a try. The brothers should stick to R-rated fare like "Bound" and "V for Vendetta." The graphics were indeed impressive, but every time the story starts to go somewhere, they throw in some stupid bit about a kid and his chimp or whatever, and it's deflating. And it doesn't quite fit to have a movie for kids that also has an odd anti-conglomerate message. Like "King Kong," the best parts don't involve humans acting. And, as a side note, I learned that in a PG film, you can say, "Get that weak shit off my track."

Z

This based-on-a-true-story thriller documents the assassination of a left-leaning (i.e., democratic, rational) politico, probably in Greece, by hired thugs of the military running the country. The film by Costa-Gavras (who also did "Missing) is still great and worthwhile. The judge who unveils the conspiracy has a great montage at the end where he hauls all who are responsible before him and, whatever position they hold or protests they make, he always says the same thing: "Name and profession." It puts them in their place, and it shows that the real hero is the one who demands the truth from power.

Missing

A journalist disappears in the aftermath of the coup in Chile in the early '70s. Jack Lemmon and Sissy Spacek look for him. Lemmon at first thinks it's "anti-establishment paranoia," but he soon comes to realize the truth -- the US was responsible, along with the fascists we supported. Still great after all these years, in part because it's not afraid to show the truth behind America's foreign policy in Central and South America.

Red Sonja

Even worse than the complete crap I thought it would be.

The Day of the Jackal

French soldiers p.o.'d about restoring independence to Algeria hire an assassin, the Jackal, to kill President de Gaulle. Alternating between the assassin's preparations and the investigation into the threat, the film is a masterpiece of tension and tight plotting. I'd rather see it a second time than watch the remake with Richard Gere and Bruce Willis.

Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines

The director of the great and underseen "Breakdown" helms this expensive B-movie that brings the trilogy to a screeching halt. The new guy they have playing John Connor is kind of a douche, as is his future wife, played by reigning douchess Claire Danes. Plus the one-liners from Arnold -- "Anger is more useful than despair" -- just don't do it for me. The film also leaves unexplored the Christian subtext of the whole series -- JC, Judgment Day, leading the resistance, and all that.

Baby Mama

"You pay the bills, she have the baby. That's called a baby mama. You ask any black man in Philadelphia." Tina Fey is the vice president of a company, and Sarah Palin looks like her, and they both want kids, so maybe this film is topical. But alas, like the thought of Palin one day running this country, it's not very funny. Mrs. The Bourne Critic thought it was hilarious until the last five minutes, when it got real stupid. Well, she's half right.

The Parallax View

A Warren Beatty '70s-era conspiratorial thriller, so technically flawed you have to crank up the sound to even guess at what the characters are saying. The only good line is what Beatty says to a drunk cop accosting him at a bar: "Don't touch me unless you love me." It has some striking cinematography, but huge plot holes that ruin the claustrophobic feeling.

Now my rant: The next critic who refers to this and "3 Days of the Condor" as classics -- and with the implication that every other conspiracy film must derive from these -- without explaining it gets demerits. They're on my list. Most recently, this emerged during reviews of "Michael Clayton," and perhaps the worst recurring offender is Peter Travers of Rolling Stone. Why is "The Parallax View" good? And why is the '70s the golden era of conspiracy films and not the '90s, with "The Game," "JFK," "Dave," and, dare I say it, "Conspiracy Theory"? The only way to get off the list is to write an in-depth article backing up the claim that Robert Altman films are worth watching -- another oft-stated but as yet unexplained belief of film critics.

Conan the Destroyer

You wanted it? You got it: Grace Jones and Wilt Chamberlain, together in a film at last. From the director of "Mandingo" and "Soylent Green." With Arnold, who punches a horse and the same camel he hit in the first film. Arnold also asks the immortal question, "What good is a sword against sorcery?" But that's not the only great line. Consider this exchange -- Girl: "Conan, there are six of them against her." Conan (spoken slowly and completely unironically): "One, two, three -- I think you're right." It's odd to have a sequel with worse special effects than the earlier original, but such is the case here.

A queen requests Wilt "20,000" Chamberlain accompany Conan and a girl to go to a castle, and the Queen assigns to Chamberlain the job of protecting the girl and -- get this -- her virginity. Wise move. I suppose if this were remade, a slightly ironic casting decision would be R. Kelly for this role.

Reprise

A Norwegian Post-French-New Wave-y, "Amelie"'-y look at two friends who become authors with varying levels of success in work, life, and relationships. It's good, but honestly, I can't think of a reason why I -- or anyone else -- needed to see this movie.

3 Days of the Condor

Based on the book entitled, believe it or not, "6 Days of the Condor." What happened to the other three days? The CIA probably stole them.

The Inglorious Bastards

I saw it because I've read Tarantino is remaking it and Fred Williamson's performance inspired Downey Jr. in "Tropic Thunder," so I suppose it should be friggin' rad, but for the most part, it's not. For a painful bonus, watch the special features and see a totally cracked-out-looking Tarantino talk with the director. And, I will say it ends with a huge explosion, and if you can't tell it's model miniatures and not the real thing, I don't want you reading this blog.

Terminator 2: Judgment Day

I saw it six times in theaters. No real need to see it again, but still good.